The Origin of Evil

CAUTION: Reading the following article will cause Allah to hate you. Oh wait, Allah already hates you!.....Read on
Note: This article is true as it is based on Wiki. There should be no cause for dispute as I am obviously write and you are obviously wrong.

As everyone knows, all the shit in this world originates in the Middle East. And unless you're a man in that part of the world, you're a slave. Did I mention you must be Muslim to qualify for freedom as well? Anyway, there were a group of people who decided to outline the male dominance by starting a group of hardcore extremists with a passion for murder (the Wiggles), way back in 1940. Fortunately, the world's favourite heroes, Teddy Roosevelt and Superman successfully put an end to this by forming, Al Qaeda. Yes, contrary to what George Bush might tell you, Al Qaeda was actually formed to stop terrorism.
The supreme leaders of the world were concerned with the reign of peace. So the diabolical minds of Darth Vader, Hitler and Mahatma Gandhi plotted the formation of a new guild of terrorism, following up the expected failure of the Middle East. This foundation was later to be called the UN. There was great concern regarding the location of this super-duper-secret base as any information leak would have led to a disaster. So Gandhi and Churchill quickly devised a clever British invasion of India. His policy of non-violence meant that half the Indian population would die out, leading to a success in the secrecy of the mission. And it did develop. All the dumbass nations like Australia, Canada and Kazakhstan went along with the idea, thinking they were making themselves worthwhile by providing support. God ultimately killed Gandhi and Churchill, and Luke Skywalker, God's nephew, took care of Darth Vader. (The tragic death can be viewed in the Richard Attenborough documentary, Star Wars VI)
With the birth of natural born heroes like Richard Nixon and Robert Mugabe, the UN gradually began to lose their power. In fact, such was their condition that they elected Kofi Annan as Secretary General. It was due to this reason that George Bush appointed Osama bin Laden as the secret head of the UN. He was in fact forced into the position. Due to his good morals and ethics, he (unfortunately) refused to execute the assassination of Fidel Castro. Therefore, Osama was exiled to the Middle East. There he met the eternal Wiggles, the ones who converted him to the dark side.
What followed was a series of wars, for possession of Afghanistan. This was a positive for the USA as it gave them an excuse to invade the country for oil. However, the new and still unnamed group (again, it’s not Al Qaeda), had gained supreme power and authority, and acquired powerful weapons like the spicy curry bomb. They recruited new soldiers like Britney Spears, Mr. Bean and Rolf Harris, pretty much anyone with abnormal behaviour. Nowadays, this unnamed group carries out mass destruction activities, and the UN has lost control. George Bush and his schemes are ineffective as the realization of his flaws have finally dawned on those retarded Americans. Some people go to the extent of believing that this group is a product of the neglect of the UN and US policies. They are mostly Muslim. It is safe to say that with the intelligence of bin Laden, the freakiness of Spears, and the ever-present retardedness of Harris, this world is pretty much doomed. (Unless of course, your Hindu and look forward to coming back as a totally new being in your next life)