The Origin of Evil

CAUTION: Reading the following article will cause Allah to hate you. Oh wait, Allah already hates you!.....Read on
Note: This article is true as it is based on Wiki. There should be no cause for dispute as I am obviously write and you are obviously wrong.

As everyone knows, all the shit in this world originates in the Middle East. And unless you're a man in that part of the world, you're a slave. Did I mention you must be Muslim to qualify for freedom as well? Anyway, there were a group of people who decided to outline the male dominance by starting a group of hardcore extremists with a passion for murder (the Wiggles), way back in 1940. Fortunately, the world's favourite heroes, Teddy Roosevelt and Superman successfully put an end to this by forming, Al Qaeda. Yes, contrary to what George Bush might tell you, Al Qaeda was actually formed to stop terrorism.
The supreme leaders of the world were concerned with the reign of peace. So the diabolical minds of Darth Vader, Hitler and Mahatma Gandhi plotted the formation of a new guild of terrorism, following up the expected failure of the Middle East. This foundation was later to be called the UN. There was great concern regarding the location of this super-duper-secret base as any information leak would have led to a disaster. So Gandhi and Churchill quickly devised a clever British invasion of India. His policy of non-violence meant that half the Indian population would die out, leading to a success in the secrecy of the mission. And it did develop. All the dumbass nations like Australia, Canada and Kazakhstan went along with the idea, thinking they were making themselves worthwhile by providing support. God ultimately killed Gandhi and Churchill, and Luke Skywalker, God's nephew, took care of Darth Vader. (The tragic death can be viewed in the Richard Attenborough documentary, Star Wars VI)
With the birth of natural born heroes like Richard Nixon and Robert Mugabe, the UN gradually began to lose their power. In fact, such was their condition that they elected Kofi Annan as Secretary General. It was due to this reason that George Bush appointed Osama bin Laden as the secret head of the UN. He was in fact forced into the position. Due to his good morals and ethics, he (unfortunately) refused to execute the assassination of Fidel Castro. Therefore, Osama was exiled to the Middle East. There he met the eternal Wiggles, the ones who converted him to the dark side.
What followed was a series of wars, for possession of Afghanistan. This was a positive for the USA as it gave them an excuse to invade the country for oil. However, the new and still unnamed group (again, it’s not Al Qaeda), had gained supreme power and authority, and acquired powerful weapons like the spicy curry bomb. They recruited new soldiers like Britney Spears, Mr. Bean and Rolf Harris, pretty much anyone with abnormal behaviour. Nowadays, this unnamed group carries out mass destruction activities, and the UN has lost control. George Bush and his schemes are ineffective as the realization of his flaws have finally dawned on those retarded Americans. Some people go to the extent of believing that this group is a product of the neglect of the UN and US policies. They are mostly Muslim. It is safe to say that with the intelligence of bin Laden, the freakiness of Spears, and the ever-present retardedness of Harris, this world is pretty much doomed. (Unless of course, your Hindu and look forward to coming back as a totally new being in your next life)

About a girl

The stars are up there shining, as they’ll always be;
There is a beautiful lady standing in front of me
She’s always on my mind, wherever I may go;
How do I tell her I like her so?
My words do injustice, to my feelings for her so deep
Days without her would never be so sweet.
And as they pass; my feelings grow
My actions may not say what I’d like to show
But now I feel I’ve gone through enough
A day without her is a day so tough
So I’ve gathered courage to finally confess
I hope my feelings, through words have been expressed

For all these words I say to you are true
This poem is a gift; from me to you.

Ocean’s Song

I gaze up at the setting sky
Lying down off the shore,
As I lose myself amongst the breeze
I hear the ocean roar

Singing songs of peace and love
An ambient harmony so sound,
My life seems to sail away,
To this ocean I am bound

I see the birds fly far and high,
Watched by the waves so clean;
The painted landscape so unblemished
Carries me to a place so serene

The waves reach heights never seen before
In a mind so fragile;
I ponder over its vast existence,
Scope to romanticise a while

As the soft breeze brushes across
I close my eyes in pensive wish,
That I could swim away without a care
No sense; just beauty to relish

O’ Ocean! She has taught me of
The simple joys to appreciate;
To forget all grief, pain and woe
To watch the sun set so far away

Beauty

I see you walk past me,
Your smile so evergreen,
You take away my sorrows,
This boy; as glad as he’s ever been

I’m drifting in another parallel,
Where I see your face all the while,
And I’d stay there forevermore
Just to see you smile

Lush hair shines in moonlight
Veiling a face so calm and serene;
Moves my sight to your gorgeous eyes,
The sweetest I’ve ever seen

I stare agape into your eyes
In their sea I am swept away,
Such beautiful eyes captivate my soul;
My mind is astray

You call to me with your sweet voice
Lips so red and pure;
And I cannot help but fall in love
With an angel, of that I’m sure

As I sit with you in paradise
My mind runs so happy and free,
I feel as if I am truly blessed
To have you beside me

Her Poem

My mind engaged in her smile
She is the one in my dreams;
Yet every time I reach out,
She drifts further away it seems

These lonesome days I have to bare
Without her sweet scent;
The girl who has captivated me;
The girl, whom I have always dreamt

I gaze across the daffodils
In my mind she is free,
Running through the fields so perfect,
Calling out to me

Yet in my sweet sense divine
I feel afraid to talk;
The birds upon the blossomed trees,
Alas, how they do mock

Me? I am but a coward
One who cannot perceive;
That the girl in my subtle dreams
Might be the one for me

I try to call out to her
In the silence that I know;
Perhaps I am too fearful
My efforts all in but hope

Maybe; maybe I’m not the one for her
I struggle to comprehend;
How miserly my attempts are
All in a world of pretense

Perhaps someday, I’ll get through
Perhaps someday, she’ll know
That a shy boy is crazy about her,
And his feelings will ever grow

Till that time I wait in hope
To gather my shackled strength;
To reach out to the one I may love
The girl, whom I have always dreamt

Reverie

Don't let me go, I am trying to reach you
But as I reach further, I lose sight of you
Why is this happening?
My life may not be perfect, But you can mend it
I stand here under the shade, Waiting for you to bring me to light
If destiny won't bring us together, I will try
It seems this dream reflects a never-ending tragedy
I call out to you, but a sigh is the only sound I produce
I see you, But you don't see me
As time goes by, I feel you weren't meant for me
But as I reach further, I hope to meet you
My life may not be perfect, mend it if you can
I see your entrancing smile in the distance
I try to walk towards you, But the more I try
The further you drift away
I run to you, every stride an obstacle
Between you and me
Please don't let me go, I need to here your voice
I have watched you drift away so many times, I cannot bare it again
I guess my tragedy is my attempt for your companionship
My life may not be perfect, But you can mend it
I know you can
One day, through my endeavour
We will be together, You and me
In a perfect dreamland
Until that time comes, Wait for me
As I try to reach you, through these clouds of disappointment



This poem is about a girl who appears in a dream

The Rising

CAUTION: Sensative readers are warned this article may cause you to hate Hitler. Oh wait, I forgot, everyone hates Hitler. Read on.

Adolf Hitler was the most feared dictator of the 20th century, paralleled only by Mahatma Gandhi. It was often thought that such an evil and vindictive person could only have been a representative of the almighty Satan, although Satan recently denied this at a press-conference.

Hitler was put to death on 30 April 1945, when he was tragically shot by his worshipper, Mark David Chapman. This restored peace on Earth and despite many slip-ups by George 'Dubya' Bush, world peace remained. That was until March, 2007; when a catastrophical mishap brought Hitler back to life.

The unfortunate incident took place on 2 March 2007, when David Blane and Criss Angel planned a practical joke on lead vocalist of My Chemical Romance, Gerard Way. They 'teleported' him to a German cemetary and gathered a crowd, promising a spectacle. And a spectacle was what the audience of 38 received. Blane and Angel attempted to draw up a spirit from a grave that would possess Way. Unlike all their previous stunts, this one was not rigged. Unfortunately, the random spirit was none other than Adolf Hitler's. The crowd witnessed Gerard Way's body being gradually possesed by Hitler. It adopted its host's personality and along with it, retained Hitler's previous strengths. Witnesses refer to this person as the 'Emo Hitler', saying he has darkness and depression in his eyes, along with an eccentric dress sense, much like Way himself. Although a major weakness has also emerged. As soon as Hitler was reborn, he ran for shelter, clearly indicating the fact that like all emos, he too is vulnerable to the sun. JK Rowling admitted to apparently been aware of the incident, but as usual she lied and her real plan was to attract attention to the release of yet another child-brainwashing multi-series books.

This incident has sparked fright and alarm amongst the global community. Hitler much like Osama and Prince Charles, is exeptional in the art of deceit and has hid himself for months now. He is also an excellent cook, though that is completely irrelevant to the topic. Many fear Hitler will be out for revenge and so are taking radical steps to mask their identity. Celebrities in panic include Diddy, who was yet again changed his name, and Michael Jackson, who has chosen a new nose.

To investigate the whereabouts of Hitler, the UN have appointed what they believe are the best CSI unit, the Jamaican police (who handled the Bob Woolmer case) for a thorough investigation. Kofi Annan claims this could escalate to the biggest case of terrorism in recent years and has ordered people around the world to be aware of any new findings. The Australian authorities however, have dismissed Hitler as a potential terrorist as no SIM card or photograph of a national monument has been found and most importantly, Adolf Hitler is not a muslim.